Selfishness Must Fall!

Today I’m heartbroken and livid! Upset by people who think they can make and do just as they please, to hell with the consequences. Never mind the impact it may have on other people’s lives.

Today I also feel disgusted in the human race. I am sick and tired of people saying “in my day” or “It takes a village” because let’s face it, the village is breaking down our youth instead of supporting them. They are too absorbed in their own lives to be bothered about honouring commitments. I guess I can’t blame them, we’re all busy. There’s not always enough time in the day for us to complete our own tasks. But then again, I kind of do. Blame them, that is.

You see, in my book, when you commit to helping someone then you follow through. When you sign a binding contract, you damn well honour it. You don’t get to decide to withdraw when you realise that you’ve stuffed up your personal schedule.

But why the rant?

Today I had to look into the face of a defeated matriculant whose English paper result might suffer because of the shock and disappointment he got this morning before writing his exam. A noble young man who was gutted because his scribe had dropped him like a hot potatoe. We all know how volatile teenagers emotions are and more so when they are writing their final exams. Like the NSC exams isn’t intimidating enough.

“But why Miss? Did she give a reason?” Was but a few of the questions he asked. At which point I could tell that he’d taken it very personally. Who wouldn’t? Truthfully I took it personally myself. Because who the hell does that! These kids may not be born of our bodies but they are ‘our’ kids and when they hurt, we do too.

I found myself validating this young man and encouraging him to not lose hope. But all I really wanted to tell him was that life is not always fair and that plenty of times people will just be “k*k” and there’s nothing he could do about them. I wanted to tell him that even though he cannot control other people’s actions, he can control his own reactions and the way he allows them to make him feel. I wanted to tell him that his scribe that dropped him was a “k*k” person and that clearly that person either a) doesn’t know what karma is or b) forgot that Karma is a female dog. I didn’t tell him any of that but I really wanted to. One battle at a time. Besides, those words will not help in his exams. What he needed today was kind words of encouragement.

Now before you go thinking this is a clapback, it really isn’t. Because this is not about the person who disappointed this young man. This is about all the adults who fail our youth daily. This is a rant!

It’s so bloody easy for adults to rhyme about kids who have no respect. About parents who don’t raise their kids right. We pass the buck and blame socio-economic circumstances, broken or single parent homes alcohol and drugs. Then that’s not even considering the music kids listen to and the programmes/movies they watch. There is always a reason for us to point a finger. Valid or made up.

I hear you, and I see you sitting on your pedestal making excuses for why you can’t want to help. I see you ‘looking in’ looking for said reasons to trigger your finger.You look pass all the good to find some damning information. The trouble is, you never know what you’re really looking at. Why are you even looking when you won’t be the one to help them rise?

Have you ever considered that kids need someone to look up to? Even if that person is not in their family or neighbourhood. And let’s face it, most of our kids are lost and they don’t get to see and experience affection, kindness, goodness and even love at home. They seek it elsewhere and in the most infuriating ways. But it’s not only the way of kids, is it? Yet we are harder on them than we are on adults. The same adults who are horrible humans who teach our kids to be disrespectful.

Today I’m not here to tell you how to be a better human. Contrary to what you may have read and the way you have interpreted this post, I’m not even writing this to tear you apart. We all have something or cause that we are passionate about. Some people invest their time, energy and money into saving dolphins whereas my cause is kids. To each his/her own. Even if you don’t have a cause it’s also ok. Charity shouldn’t be forced. You either do it or you don’t. No judgies. Don’t let anyone ever make you feel guilty about it.

What peeves me is the nay sayers. Always talking about when they were young… The people who would more than likely tear you apart for messing with their kids but who have no problem bailing on your kid. People who breach contracts and disappoint kids like they are just numbers. Or at the very least, a few rand less in their pockets. That is unfortunately what kids lives are reduced to.

Kids are not always given a chance. If they aren’t ‘cute’ they don’t count. The ones that’s a bit rough around the edges are overlooked. If they look a bit too rough we are weary of them. They are judged by their parentage and circumstances. None of which they have any control. They have to make do with life has given them.

If you are that person then this is for you…

  • If you cannot follow it through, don’t make promises or commitments.
  • People can do bad by themselves, they don’t need your help. Especially kids.
  • Just don’t be a k*k person!
  • Always member that we all need each other at some or other time in our lives. Be careful which bridges you burn. That same kid could be someone mighty important one day.
  • Kids are people too. They deserve respect too. Respect is earned and not an age advantage.
  • Stop judging kids unfairly for what they look like or circumstances they are born into.
  • Kids are our future so be careful how you handle them.

Rant over. But selfishness must fall because kids are people too!

PS: This post is not motivated by the “kids will be kids” clichè.

With love,


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